Frustrated, he sends e-mails to all his friends and coworkers, to no avail.Īfter an hour, he wakes the blonde and hands her $500.00. He taps into the air phone with his modem and searches the net and the library of congress, no answer. The lawyer, puzzled, takes out his laptop computer and searches all his references, no answer. She asks the lawyer, “What goes up a hill with three legs and comes down with four legs?”
The blonde doesn’t say a word, reaches into her purse, pulls out a $5.00 bill and hands it to the lawyer. “What’s the distance from the earth to the moon?” This catches the blonde’s attention and, figuring there will be no end to this torment unless she plays, agrees to the game. The lawyer, now agitated, says, “Okay, if you don’t know the answer you pay me $5.00, and if I don’t know the answer, I will pay you $500.00.” He explains, “I ask you a question, and if you don’t know the answer, you pay me $5.00, and vice versa.”Īgain, she declines and tries to get some sleep. The lawyer persists and explains that the game is easy and a lot of fun. The blonde, tired, just wants to take a nap, politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few winks. The lawyer asks if she would like to play a fun game. The engineer says, “Why can’t they play at night?”Ī blonde and a lawyer are seated next to each other on a flight from LA to NY. The lawyer likewise looks chagrined, “Same here, I’ll check with my firm and see if we can’t open a case to get them awarded restitution for their pain and injuries.”
At my next sermon, I’ll see if I can get a collection going for their families.” The priest looks ashamed of himself, “As a man of God, I feel terrible for getting angry at those men.
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They love golf, so I let them play for free for charity.” The manager looks sheepish, “They’re retired firefighters, they lost their eyesight running into a burning orphanage to save the children. “What’s with that group of players? They’re the worst I’ve ever seen! They’re holding up the course!”
Clean jokes Patch#
They were hitting the balls all over the place, getting stuck in just about every trap and patch of rough, and missing just about every putt.įinally, the group gets frustrated and heads to the clubhouse to find the manager. One day, they get stuck behind the slowest group of players they had ever seen. The Engineer finds the number on the ball then pulls out their book of red rubber balls and finds its specifications.Ī lawyer, a priest, and an engineer meet each week for a game of golf.
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The physicist knows that Archimedes discovered how to determine the volume of an object so they submerge it in water and record the change in water level. The mathematician knows that the volume of a sphere has been mathematically determined so he measures the radius and puts it into the proper formula. Jesus looks at Moses and says, “I really think I’m leaving Dad at home next time!”Ī Mathematician, and Physicist, and an Engineer are asked to find the volume of a red rubber ball. A fish jumps from the water hazard swallowing the ball, as an eagle drops from the sky, grabbing the fish.Īs the eagle flies over the green, a bolt of lightning strikes the eagle, making it drop the fish.Īs the fish hits the green, it spits out the ball and the ball falls into the hole, making a hole in one. The ball looks like it is going to drop directly into the water. The old man’s turn comes and he drives the ball.
The ball skips across the water and lands on the green two feet from the hole. Jesus gets up to swing, cranks it out, and it is headed for the water hazard. Moses raises his club, the water parts, and the ball makes it to the green. He smashes the ball and it is heading right for the water hazard before the green. Golfer: “Do you think my game is improving?”Ĭaddy: “Yes sir, you miss the ball much closer now.” Laugh yourself and share the funniest jokes with your friends! Enjoy our team's carefully selected Clean Jokes.